Chris and I have been working on a list of parenting desires ever since we decided we wanted to have children together. Recently I decided to start documenting them in one space so we have a cohesive list of our wishes.
This is our list pre-children. I am not naive to think that these things won't change and I acknowledge that we have no knowledge as to what parenting is actually like. But in an attempt to prayerfully and thoughtfully walk into this next season we wanted to have as many of these conversations as possible.
So here goes nothing. Here are just 5 of our rules, wishes and dreams for our future children:
- We want our children to be comfortable with boredom. I can't tell you how many times I have heard children complain "I'm bored." It is our hope that we teach our children how to fill there time well and how to enjoy the the breaths between events. In an effort to walk that road before them, Chris and I have never had cable and we have limited Wifi. (yes that is a thing) We watch very little television and try to spend as much time as possible outside, enjoying a book or playing a board game. We have to allow ourselves to be comfortable with boredom if we can ever expect that from our children.
- We want to foster a sense of curiosity, wonder, and imagination. We want to create environments that inspire questioning and let our children come to their own conclusions. We have started playing more and enjoying our own imaginations. Our capacity for this right now is low but like any muscle, it will become stronger with practice.
- To be a "stuff free" family. Easier said than done but we have started questioning our purchases and belongings. We want to raise our children to give more than they receive and selfishly, we don't our house overran with junk.
- To encourage a healthy relationship to food. We want to eat to nourish our bodies. This isn't to say that we don't enjoy our food but that we weigh unhealthy choices with exercise and love for our flesh (temples.) We are currently trying to undo a lot of bad habits in our own journey to physical health and we hope to make this path clearer for our children.
- Lastly, we want to encourage healthy risk taking. We hope to change our verbiage around risky behavior from "be careful" to "pay attention." We want them to understand that risk taking doesn't always turn out positively but that it is sometimes necessary and nothing to be afraid of.
This is a very small snippet of our long list of desires and dreams but it has been so fun to discuss the environment we want to create for our children. What decisions did you and your significant other make for your children? How did these change once you had a child? What advice do you have for hopeful parents?